Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Letting Go

Over time, it seems like I've become a bit of a project horder. I like to add new hobbies without really giving up any. But I think it is time to let go. This month I decided to stop drawing my daily comic. Actually, I hadn't drawn it for a few months, but this month I finally admitted to myself that I wasn't ever going to catch up. I started this comic in college to help me feel like I'd accomplished something every day. A little 3 panel comic reminded me that even though I had a mound of school work, I still could do a little something for myself.

After I graduated it got more and more difficult to keep up. Soon this little project that was suppose to make me feel accomplished started doing the opposite. I felt crushing amounts of guilt that I wasn't able to keep up and I started to punish myself creatively. Little rules would pop up in my head such as, "If you don't make up 3 missed comics, you aren't allowed to draw anything else." I've spent over a year putting myself down because I can't keep up with it. So I'm finally giving it up. There hasn't been an instant feeling of relief though. It's like a break-up. You know it's for the better, but you still look at it with fond memories. Does anyone else have a project that they might need to give up?

(On a side note, I've had another setback with wisdom tooth recovery and am now on antibiotics a third time. I think at this point I'll just let you all know when I'm better. The minute I am, I plan to have a week-long food orgy involving steak, pizza, sandwiches, and casadias.)

6 comments :

Anonymous said...

I finally gave up a sweater that had been hibernating for MONTHS. I'm going to rip it all out, and my roommate has already called using the yarn for a sweater for her!

Alina Sayre said...

Good for you. I'm coming to believe that there's a time and a season for all sorts of things, and when it's not the season, it's better to let go and move on to whatever is right for the time. Let me know when you're ready for that food orgy :P

Anonymous said...

You should publish those cartoons one day, or at least include a few of them in your book or work (I suspect they'll be quite funny). Letting go is fine. You should never allow that gives you joy to become a burden. And you can always keep cartooning for fun every now and then!

I'm sorry to hear your jaws are still playing up. That's no good at all. Healing well wishes!

Andi said...

I'm sorry to hear that your teeth aren't cooperating! I hope they get better soon so you can eat everything.

Pumpkin said...

More antibiotics! That is horrible, please take extra good care of yourself and then definitely have a super food orgy! I definitely know how you feel about the comics, I have the same exact kind of of guilt over things I've started over the years. I used to keep an art journal with at least one pretty photo I took everyday, it was wonderful. But somehow along the way I lost the motivation and didn't enjoy it anymore. I think you did the right thing by letting it go, now you are free to start something new and exciting!

Unknown said...

I've totally been there, don't feel too bad! I just went through my stash today and gave up on a lot of imaginary projects, donated the yarn I was holding onto for a particular project "someday". It's along similar lines, and you do feel better after a while.

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